Big Deal, I Overslept or Shut Up Until I've Had My Coffee!

I love the snooze button on my alarm clock.  We have a long-term relationship that only we understand.  I set my alarm clock to a certain time, but Snooze Button (SB) knows I really need about 27 more minutes of sleep parceled out in three 9-minute intervals.  SB totally gets me.  Hubs, on the other hand, is totally jealous of the relationship I have with SB.  I've known SB longer, but we're just friends.  He's not jealous.  Hubs is an early bird and he doesn't understand 9-minute intervals; I think because math confuses him.  So don't show up 6.5 minutes into my 2nd snooze without coffee in your hand. Seriously.  Especially don't infringe on me and SB's quality time with your annoying ass bitching about something stupid that you could easily do in the 11.5 minutes I have left with SB.  How inconsiderate of you!  So next time you come between me and SB, expect the alarm clock to brought into it, probably upside your head.  Then me and SB will get back to snoozing while you bleed out on the floor.  Fair warning.